• MrVilliam@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    It varies from person to person. The act itself imo is pretty good, but I don’t really enjoy it unless there’s a real connection. Others mentioning things like hiring prostitutes here are recommending that you miss out on what I think it’s a pretty key part of it, plus I think you’d be assuming some real risk in terms of whether that’s criminal, will you be robbed, could you get an STI from them, and of course whether it’s even affordable in the first place. I can understand the desire to try it once, but I can’t imagine it being much better than masturbating compared to the risk and cost.

    I think I’d recommend getting on Tinder or something similar and just making it clear in your profile that you’re looking for something casual but want to message a bit first to make sure they’re at least somewhat of a match for you. Sometime before getting naked, it’d be a good idea to say that you haven’t done this before and ask for clear communication so that both of you can enjoy yourselves. You want to be on the same page. And go slowly. You almost certainly won’t have a good time if you’re feeling pressured and rushed.

    Overall, yes it’s worth trying, but a lot of people stop thinking rationally entirely when sex is a possibility and I think that’s a bit silly. It’s okay to come to the conclusion that it’s not worth the hassle or even not enjoyable at all to you. It’s totally subjective. Just don’t do anything you don’t feel comfortable with.

      • MrVilliam@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        I disagree since I met the woman who is now my wife through Tinder lol. We both were looking for something casual and found something worth much more. But it’s almost certainly gotten shittier like everything else, so I understand your reluctance to try it.

        In that case, get yourself cleaned up and head out to a bar/club and see if you can meet somebody organically. Be ready to talk about your job, hobbies, and interests. Maybe get a few clever jokes locked and loaded. Passionate, nice, and funny will make you a magnet to decent people. Just temper your expectations because it sounds like you’re probably gonna a swing and miss a few times until you find a comfortable batting stance.

        • Hate@lemmy.worldOP
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          4 days ago

          Thank you for taking your time answering. Even though I can’t imagine myself changing into all that just to get laid, I want to feel that pleasure, I really do, but I’m antisocial and mostly a NEET. So that isn’t going to happen. Plus I live in the middle of fucking nowhere…

          If the world was as prefect and beautiful as how the Louis Armstrong says, people like me would get a chance… But we know how much of a shit hole is, especially for people like me.