• AnarchoNoAdjective@lemmy.ml
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    6 months ago

    Would it be possible to volunteer some time to an organization like food not bombs I heard they were getting fines and arrested for distributing food. You could possibly secure some food, help the community and still potentially go to prison for not paying the bogus fine.

  • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Shoplift food until you get caught and go to jail.

    If you get caught without going to jail just keep shoplifting, at least you’ll always have food.

    • Chip_Rat@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Just make sure to do it from Walmart or Lowblaw or some other government teet sucking price gouging corporation.

  • L0rdMathias@sh.itjust.works
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    6 months ago

    Low effort high sentence crime like credit card or check fraud. Represent yourself in court and be a complete ass to maximize the jury’s dislike of you, no sob stories reveal zero empathy for what you did. Try to find that sweet spot between minimum security prison, but long sentencing. Make a friend in jail and start a “fight” with them the day before your probation hearing or something to extend the behavior without angering the guards/warden too much?

    It’s a pretty high risk low reward strategy, but the risk is mostly because it’s hard to get into a “good prison”. Also make sure you do it in a state with free prison, some states are pay-to-stay prison, though I guess that could open the opportunity for loan fraud and another sentence if you do get out?

  • BobGnarley@lemm.ee
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    6 months ago

    Anything drug related.

    If you grow a few mushrooms they can charge you with manufacture and give you like 10 to 20 years.

    • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Best thing to do is sell a coke dealer some Bitcoin, then use that money to buy some more Bitcoin from a friend. Don’t rat anyone out when you get caught.

      It depends on the amounts, but that’ll get you federal time for money laundering and conspiracy.

      That’s what Chris Boden did. Of course, he was dealing with thousands of dollars. Several thousand.

      For context: https://youtu.be/cuIRvn89988

  • Valmond@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    If you went to sweden and made some enough bad crime, you’d get ss and food and shelter til they figure out how to ship you back.

    Ot find a european soulmate to marry!

    • harrys_balzac@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      6 months ago

      Exactly! Make sure it’s a felony otherwise you might be billed for every day you’re in jail. Plus, a good enough felony will get you to prison for a good long time. Basically, anything with “grand” in the front of it.

      • bamfic@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Some joker robbed a US post office in my town a year or so ago. Federal felony.

      • Today@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        You can end up paying room and board, mandatory counseling, classes, drug tests, etc. Plus phone calls are outrageously expensive. It’s a total racket.

        • Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml
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          6 months ago

          How does that work if you don’t have money or just don’t? I mean what are they going do? Put you in jail?

          • Droechai@lemm.ee
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            6 months ago

            Take a piece of all future income until it’s paid off of you pass away. At least here you can personally bankrupt once in a life time and live on “lowest livable” amount of money for five years and then get the debts “forgiven” except those accrued during the five year period.

            It’s a hassle to apply and get granted though, usually not the privacy invasion invasion a recently released care to subject to

  • PenisDuckCuck9001@lemmynsfw.com
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    6 months ago

    If I were in this situation I think I would go for literally any option that doesn’t involve being imprisoned and freely abused by people. Wilderness survival would even be preferable. Surely most people being abused by our broken system have done at least some research and experimentation on this because I sure have. I might die but at least I’d die free.

    Edit: didn’t see partially disabled. Ignore this comment.

  • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Go to Walmart. Eat whatever you want. Sleep there

    If they call the cops on you because of theft or trespassing, there ya go.

    Bonus points if you find a way to do this without getting caught and live there a while.

    Or start a Tiktok account and a go fund me, and tell your story on TT. Sometimes you can reach the right person near you to do something

    • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      If I had the money, I’d pay to watch this. I watch Extra Cheesy Broccoli on YouTube a bit; Steve Wallis isn’t homeless, but does a lot of stealth camping in unusual places.

  • MNByChoice@midwest.social
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    6 months ago

    If you are set on this, then do crimes that, if successful, would improve your life.

    Steal billions of dollars from bad corporations. Steal food to live, trespass to be in shelter.

    Personally, I would try to go to the cheapest town and get on benefits. Each state has a really cheap place to exist. There are usually no jobs, but often friendly people.

  • ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    6 months ago

    Carry out targeted attacks on the people and institutions that create the situation that you’re in. Find other people in a similar situation with little to lose; there is safety in numbers. If people affected by this banded together, the problem would cease to exist.

  • mortemtyrannis@lemmy.ml
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    6 months ago

    The myth that you can go to jail and it’s free board and food is exactly that, a myth.

    You’ll pay for it one way or another.

    It’s peddled by conservatives who think that jail is some kind of walk in the park. Sure there are nicer prisons but it’s still prison. No one really prefers it to being out on the street.

    • j4k3@lemmy.worldOP
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      6 months ago

      The alternative is worse for me. I can not survive on my own. Debt is irrelevant in death as an alternative.

      • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        6 months ago

        I’m a little confused. It sounds like your pain and disability issues would be exponentially worse in a prison environment. What little relief you get now would be gone. What little activity you are capable of now would be gone. You would be a vulnerable person locked up with loads of people who are experts at exploiting vulnerability. You aren’t even guaranteed that the elements won’t kill you in there—there are recent cases of prisoners dying from summer heat indoors due to no A/C.

        Given your options, I would seriously consider a city that tolerates homelessness over intentionally choosing prison. It will be a hell of a lot easier to dig yourself out of homelessness, if you ever do, than it will be to outrun the reputation that comes from a major conviction.

        I think you need to be way more realistic about what your options actually are.

        • j4k3@lemmy.worldOP
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          6 months ago

          You’re thinking in terms if financial and sustainable self sufficiency. In the context of the post, you’re implying I should just kill myself, whether you intend it or not. I can not survive on the street. I am unemployable. It takes everything I have just to manage staying alive and I still need someone to help me with shopping.

          I get it. I wish I had never regained consciousness that day. There are many days I would like to make that a reality. In this country, that reality is not my choice to make. Without family to support me, I am lost to the murder factory of a disgusting and deplorably evil country. This is what I am spotlighting with this post. A country is its people.

          • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            6 months ago

            I’m not in any way trying to imply that you should kill yourself. I’m implying that there are dangers with both homelessness and prison, but at least with homelessness, there is the possibility that circumstances will change for the better. Prison guarantees your circumstances for the duration of your sentence, guarantees that the conditions will be punishing, and guarantees a stigma that will make you even more unemployable than you say that you already are.

            My only point is that I believe the dangers of prison match or exceed the dangers of homelessness, and you should seriously consider that there are ways to be homeless that are safer and less awful than others.

            If you can’t survive on the street, I don’t see why you think you’d make it in prison.

  • Illuminostro@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    What’s the safest way for peasants to rid themselves of a dictator who is killing their young men in a stupid vanity war?