It can be other things. Some of why I didn’t get stuff done when younger was actually a symptom of PTSD from unrelated trauma. Basically my stress response is messed up and so anything I could link to stress or shame can make me avoidant, which snowballs into not doing the thing and more stress.

When I unlinked daily tasks from shame and stress I could suddenly do them, as I actually have ok executive functioning when PTSD isn’t messing with me to cause avoidance which as I understand would not really be the case for ADHD. Although PTSD and the like can also pop up in ADHD people who were bullied for their symptoms.

Dungeons and (bad) Dragons

That’s a good deal.

I just got a Pixel 8, but it’s not all that frugal since I paid…not the full highest price, but high enough. That said, I plan to hold onto it for the full 7 years of updates–and thankfully, Pixels can be rooted so if I want I can slap my own stuff on there if I don’t like what Google’s doing a few years in.

I broke my previous real phone about a year ago when I didn’t have money to replace it, so I got THE cheapest smartphone in the universe to tide me over–and my god, it was horrible. A year of torture using that thing. I didn’t even think a smartphone COULD be that bad–I still think of it as a new technology, cutting edge, so how could any model possibly be awful?–but it was truly awful. Moto G Pure. Don’t get one. Awful awful awful. Basically, it just doesn’t have enough power to deal with ordinary apps–lots of freezing, lag, etc. Could barely keep one app at a time open. Like, it would choke on ordinary grocery shopping apps. So I’d be trying to apply this or that coupon, and I’d have to twiddle my thumbs in the middle of the aisle like an idiot until it decided to work (or not).

So I think I over-compensated with the Pixel 8 by getting the first flagship phone I’ve ever had.

…I do use Mint Mobile on the cheapest yearly plan, lol, so I have that going for me.

This was a smaller moment, but similar to yours, OP, in that it revealed some unconscious thinking in my head.

But I was playing Crusader Kings II quite a few years back. And I basically had a King with the Genius trait and some other stuff I could pass down to his kids. I think I had somehow lucked into the Byzantine Empire or something, so I was basically seducing and inviting a bunch of lovers with other traits from all around the world (north and south, east and west) so I could spread Genius around. I wanted a smart council full of my bastards, heh.

So my genius slut-king has a bunch of kids. I’m naming them after my absolute favorite characters from books and such, because they’re part of my family and dynasty–so I’m giving them names that have a lot of personal “worth” to me.

Then I get to the kid in my dynasty who isn’t white, and I couldn’t figure out what name to give her. I had all these awesome names that I was using over and over through the generations in my dynasty, but somehow none that felt “right” for her. I tried and tried to choose a name, and none “fit”.

And after a while, it suddenly hit me in the face how SUBTLE racism can be. This was just a video game, but I had something that was “high worth” to me to give out, these favorite character names, and I was handing them out like candy until I got to the one kid and struggled, making all sorts of excuses why this not-white video game kid couldn’t get the name of this other character I really liked.

Now, if I was doing that in a frickin’ video game, imagine what people are doing with REAL LIFE things that are “high worth” to them. Hiring at jobs, giving gifts and presents, selling a house, etc.

And it wasn’t like I was going around in the game consciously picking which kids to screw over. (I mean, moreso than you usually do in Crusader Kings, the game where people glitch themselves into marrying their horses and creating witch covens with devil-babies so they can spread satanism across the world.) I ended up screwing this virtual kid over because I was going on this “gut feeling” that my really cool favorite-character names just somehow “weren’t right” for her, even though that frickin’ inbred cousin over there with a family tree like a wreath was proudly wearing it already.

So yeah. Learned a big lesson on how internal gut feelings influence you to do racist shit really subtly sometimes.

I got to the start of Act 3, but I kinda stopped because I found out a few things…

• I missed an Act 1 companion
• I learned you can respec companions (d’oh)
• Being a wizard who’s romancing Gale means too many wizards in my party (and I didn’t know I could maybe respec him…)
• I felt like I was only really “understanding” how best to play by Act 3 and I basically just want a do-over so things are less messy.

I’ve found pressure cookers are the only way I can get beans tender. (I’m not a great cook.)