I’m 34 and yeah I’m still living with my mother, share the room with my uncle, her brother (he lives with us).
I don’t have a job right now but even when I HAD a full time job I didn’t had intention of moving, I don’t have a partner to share the bills and living alone could fuck completely my life and not just partially.
If you think that’s weird I have 3 uncles, in their late 50 still living with my grandma in their big house. Only 1 of them are married and the other 2 never had a gf. All that part of the family is living there.
Me too. I do remote work. Our rural home is comfortably big enough to accommodate 5 people. It’s cheaper to share bills, no rent, CoL is cheaper in the rural area too.
My baby bonds well with my parents too.
My parents live with me.
Okay, well, one of them now. They divorced under our roof during covid while my wife was pregnant with our first child. Ah, fun times!
I live with my wife, she’s almost like family
She’s literally family the moment you marry her, bro…
Nothing wrong with that setup if everyone is on board with it.
39 and live with my dad because I can only ever get jobs that pay minimum fucking wage and no matter how long I stay somewhere, I never get a raise. When he dies, I’ll end up working 60 hours a week to still be fucking homeless. This country is fucking shit.
15,825 posts and comments in a year… 😬
Lemmy is your job, apparently
FTFY
I can’t even get those type of jobs and just forget about even trying to have a family. We’re fucked.
I live in a high cost of living area and I was just telling my coworker, who lives in another state, that I know several people my age (mid-40s) who either still live with their parents or who live with several roommates of the same age, and I don’t blame them a bit because it’s fucking insane out there, dude, and only getting worse.
Yes. It’s Asian culture :)
In my case is more poor culture / anti social
I think it depends on circumstances. Some people are genuine neckbeard NEETs who need to stop being a drain on society. Some people are just jobsearching or in education and aren’t assholes to everyone they live with.
Yeah if you’re a functional member of society, then I don’t at all get the stigma. It’s the NEETs that should be getting a bad rap.
I’ve got my own place, but I’ve asked my mom to come live with me before. She doesn’t want to lol (for various reasons, but we have a really good relationship), but I definitely would feel super comfortable doing so if the circumstances called for it!
Why would they had to get a bad rap?
Unless you have a severe illness you’re receiving government benefits for, NEETs are generally in the position through their own fault because they are lazy
I moved out to go to college at 18 and back in with my mom as 21 after dropping out due to financial issues. I had trouble finding work there, nothing stable that paid well. I was a pretty lonely depressed guy, a virgin into my 20s, with nothing significant in my life and nothing to offer anyone else. It was a pretty shit time for me. I ended up moving in briefly with my dad 2 states away and was able to find a decent paying factory job shortly thereafter and got my own apartment. Then I found an even better paying factory job a year or two later, and got promoted to management within the year. I lost a bunch of weight, was able to save money, lost my virginity finally and I bought a house. I met the woman who would become my wife. Sold my house moved in with her. Went back to school, got my degree, got a much higher paying job, bought a much nicer house and we just had our first kid.
I don’t want to tell you how to live and I am not under the impression that everyone can just do what I did. Everyone is different. Circumstances are different. I know. But nothing in my life started to improve from my lowest point in my adulthood until I stopped the complacency, moves out and worked to improve myself and my life. I would be shocked if your 50+ year old uncles who live with you grandmother and have never had a girlfriend are truly happy with their situation. I would encourage you to seek to change your situation if you can. I’m only a year older than you. At one time I was tens of thousands in debt, out of shape, had teeth falling out, living with my mom, no social life, no girlfriends, sexless, penniless, and had no hope or outlook in life. I have had my own share of failures, yet I am in a good place now. I got my teeth fixed, got a degree, i have a nice job, a nice house, a wife and beautiful daughter, and we’re comfortable. I hope you can get there too.
This type of post depress me more tbh. But it’s not your fault. You just said it, you’re my age and got all that. I have nothing.
I don’t know what your situation is. Do you go outside much? What’s stopping you from getting a job? I basically had to exposure therapy myself to the outside world and it was difficult and took nearly two years but it was so so so much worth it.
I just don’t wanna be social and hate the world. And the few interviews I got had failed. I’m not charming or funny, so no wonder I’m invisible to women. And, this is important, I feel like this is my nature, it’s not going to change. I have no education because I know I couldn’t handle it, I’m dumb. And all the manual jobs here ask for experience before. Even for a fucking fast food.
The only real job I had lasted for 4 years but quit due the abuse there. I got sick of their bs.
I’m going to be straight to you here: The only thing holding you back is yourself. If you have a neurodivergency, I recommend getting in touch with an agency that helps find work for ND people. Your nature isn’t going to change by just sitting in your room all day. I don’t want to work either; I don’t think anybody does. I don’t want to do education. But forcing myself through it as difficult as it was made me a MUCH better person and more capable and gave me a job that even though I struggle with some days, I enjoy. By sitting in your room all day, you’re just going to make yourself worse and there’ll be no future for you. Don’t give up in your 30’s. It’s not too late to do something. Switch off the news as well, delete social media if you have to. There is bad news about this world as we’re a fallen species, but for our own life, we have to make the best of it.
It is dude. It’s done and I get it. Someone has to die alone and failed. Otherwise this world would be over populated. I get that you’re trying to be positive but that doesn’t work for me.
Overpopulation is a myth. We need more younger people than older people
You have seemed to make it clear that you want to die alone and not even try. If you won’t get therapy of some kind, don’t try and make other people suffer or justify your situation in front of other people. People are giving you advice here and you’re refusing it, trying to justify yourself as some hero over “overpopulation” or something, and it’s pathetic. You have plenty of time, you should resolve to want to turn your life around.
I just don’t wanna be social and hate the world.
Saying that after also talking about how your situation is depressing to you indicates you want things to be different but aren’t ready to try to make anything different. People’s life circumstances can fuck with them, for sure, but the only person who can make anything different for you is you.
You’re stuck having a pity party for yourself and you’ve spun your self-hatred into hatred for “the world.” Try really hard to let go of whatever shame and self-hatred you’re holding on to and accept that none of us are perfect, and there are actually plenty people out there who would accept you and be your friend if you treat them with respect.
I’m one of the parents in this arrangement and we wouldn’t have it any other way. We raised three kids, a son and two daughters. None of us are rich by any means, but we’re all currently self-sufficient. The one’s that live here don’t do it out of need, but because they’d be crazy not to. We own a decent-sized ranch style house, plenty of room for two couples, on 2.6 acres with a largish pool, and it’s conveniently located to everything one wants to be convenient to. At this stage in our lives, if it were just my wife and I here we’d go crazy. This place has been the central family gathering spot for our local extended family for decades now. Pretty much every month at least one big gathering is happening here. Anywho… We’ve paid it off and deeded it to a trust, with the three kids being successor trustees. Once we’re gone, the property transfers automatically. They can live here forever, or they can sell it and split the proceeds three ways, but I seriously doubt they’ll ever do that. Our oldest lives nearby quite affordably with his girlfriend (both child-free by choice), and our middle daughter and her husband own their own place with our two grand-daughters just outside of town. Our youngest daughter and her husband (no kids yet) live here with us. This son-in-law races street-stocks on dirt and was able to build a big 30’ x 60’ shop in the back, so this place is like heaven to him. He’s 28 going on 12 and has a pretty good job, so he gets to buy whatever toys he wants, and with the investment of his shop into the property, he’s actually got some skin in the game. They are both hugely helpful, and it’s a great arrangement for all of us. We’re currently kicking around some ideas for my son and his girlfriend to move back onto the property, but into their own space…
I feel like I got a free glimpse into your life and it’s great
Sounds fantastic for real. Enjoy
You all sound lucky. Yeah, I’m i don’t have those options… Is either this tiny room or the streets
Seems to me like a great thing you have. My children are still pretty young, but I hope I can give them a comfortable place with us all my life if they so choose.
I don’t have that kind of relationship with my parents, so I hope I’ll be able to have one with my own children.
Moved out at 18 and never looked back. You couldn’t pay me to live with them.
Moved out at 17. Haven’t spoken to my parents in over a decade. The only interaction I plan on having with them in the future is pissing on their graves.
I moved out at 18 as well, was back briefly for a week when I dropped out of college. 10 years ago I moved my wife and kids back to my hometown and we lived with my parents for 6 months while we found our own place.
My mom moved out a couple years ago, and I am about to move back in with my dad to take care of him. I have an RV parked next to his house. If my mother was still living with my dad I would never consider it.
I live with my sister and her husband. We have a decent size house with a yard that neither of us would be able to afford alone.
Not for two decades now, and thank god for that.
Well I think it’s a combination of culture and personal rasons. I moved into a shared flat with two friends when I was 19, had many other shared flats with 2-4 people another 15 years. At your age being together with my partner for 4 years I moved to an own flat for the first time of my life (without my partner). Living with my parents is unthinkable for me, it’s usually enough when I visit for a few days.
I’m 19 dropped out of college and still living with parents. Right now I’m really planning on just saving up to move to Japan because everything in the US is taxed to high hell and our government is barely functional. I’m just fed up with everything so I’m just going to keep myself sane by studying Japanese and minimizing my expenses
You know moving to another country isn’t as simple as just deciding to do so and booking a flight, right? Most non-part time jobs in Japan require a degree, for example, as do most work visas for foreigners.
